I have a huge fear of death, or rather annihilation. I used to be an atheist. That was just a small step after leaving religion. I didn't really think about consciousness back then, it seemed obvious - we are physical beings. Then suddenly came the realisation of my mortality. That was the worst time of my life. I was going to therapy and it was helping with my everyday problems, but this one persists many years later. There was a time when I really believed life was meaningful and death wasn't the end, but unfortunately I'm losing this belief. It's just not good enough... I observed something interesting - even when I read something I find illogical writen by a materialist, I still am overcome by panic. What if he's right? It doesn't matter that what he's saying is nonsense. I'm terrified. I'm sorry about writing so much about my fears, maybe it's not the right place, but I'd really appreciate your help. If you can link me the best works - scientific or not - regarding consciousness, I'd be thankful. I remember seeing a compiled list of evidence linked on this forum (NDE's, conscousness, etc.) Does anyone know where I can find it? Finally I'd appreciate some thoughts from you on my issue. Thanks and sorry again if it isn't the right place to post this.